Author: livingawordylife

I find myself looking for things to keep me busy lately… distractions help me with my grief. That interference that keeps me busy gives me control; which I feel I so desperately need. I have walked miles, cleaned everything, organized every closet and drawer, and have caught up on 6400 emails in the last two weeks. I am surely on my path to being the most organized woman of 2021. Hopefully, there is an award for that I love an award so sign me up!

Friends and family have stepped in and have filled a lot of my time with fellowship and love. I do appreciate the visits, phone calls, emails, texts and all of the gifts that have shown up at my door. The love that I have received is such a blessing and I will forever be grateful to each one of you for your kindness. I have an incredible support group that loves me unconditionally and I am so grateful to have each one of you in my life.

Today I head back to Charleston… it has been two weeks since Daddy passed away. I cannot wait to wrap my arms around my sister and hug her tightly. I know she needs it as much as I do right now. What a treasure my Daddy gave to me- Margaret Ann!
A built in best friend; a confidant. My sister brings me joy, and we laugh oh my goodness do we laugh- and dance, randomly we just dance. I love that baby doll of mine she has been perfect since that first day she was brought home back in 1980. I am forever grateful for her especially on days like today when I need her to be my rock and hug me tight enough to put me back together.

Margaret Ann and I were together two weeks ago when we got the news of Daddy’s heart attack and passing. They say that God works in mysterious ways- I say that he has purpose in everything that he does. “There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven”—Ecclesiastes 3:1

We were able to be with each other and to ride back to home to Dads together the next day. This was so important.. we were not alone. We had each other. I remember her rubbing my back as I drove with tears in my eyes home that Wednesday morning. What a relief just having her with me as I drove. Just her presence was all that I needed. He certainly placed her with me in this time of loss because he knew what an abundance to my aching soul she would be- and how her succor would guide me home.

I am packed and ready for what is ahead of me and I look forward to the drive. Even though this damn rain keeps on falling…off to Charleston.

Love to all- XOXO

Psalm 23:4

Every Sunday as a child I attended church in Whiteville, North Carolina at First Presbyterian Church on Thompson Street. We also had a beach house that we used in the summer and on the weekends so we had a church home in North Myrtle Beach, South Carolina too Ocean Drive Presbyterian Church.

I looked forward to Sunday school morning service because it was always started with donut holes, juice and a prayer. That was not the only reason but it was a great start – church was a constant in my childhood. I had fun learning, laughing, making friends, making art, singing, taking trips, and being a part of this extended family.

I enjoyed the message that was taught at church, the love of Christ – how he loved me and how I loved him. Even though there was no physical relationship- and as a curious redhead that was a tall mountain to climb to get me to understand. I acknowledged the trust that I had in my faith because of Jesus and his teachings. I recognized that his words had traveled through generations, his disciples stories and depictions of him remind us to love one another; his death saves us.

What we called BIG CHURCH was the 11 o’clock hour, the sermon. Psalm 23:4 was said every Sunday and I was never sure why. I never asked why. We recited a lot of things in big church and I asked a lot of questions. I was one of three so I only had so many questions in a day. When I went through confirmation I was able to get all my questions answered and even more. I am a believer and love the words and teachings of Jesus.

It means so much to me right now. I know I am okay. I know that. I keep repeating that in my head…. I am replacing it with prayer. Todays prayer is Psalm 23:4 one that I used to recite every Sunday without knowing the meaning. Today it is giving me courage, strength and is bringing me closer to Jesus.

Bless my GREAT SHEPARD I will continue on… I know that you will protect me. I trust you to keep me from harm, to make my path clear from any pending danger. I will find comfort, protection, peace and will seek refuge in you until my last breathe Amen.

Today I love my father as I love Jesus… spiritually. He has prepared us. Matthew 24:44
“Therefore you also must be ready, for the Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect.” I find comfort in the words in my Bible. I know that I am prepared for what comes next for me because I am a child of God.

Imagine small town USA in the 80’s 3 children under the ages of 10 and 2 parents trying to eat a meal after a long day….

The record player plays B.J. Thomas and chatter ensues during a dinner where arguments and celebrations happen daily. This time of day was a special time where we shared the good and bad times of the day… listened to music – sang along and laughed. Laughter erupted more than anything around our table. Love was shown and taught in every moment. Peace was made when needed and there was never a shortage of hugs or kisses.

Memories have flooded my brain the last six days since Daddy passed away…and the rain continues to fall on my head as the weather has been dreadful. B.J. Thomas was a favorite at our table and we loved to sing along; it helped this morning too.

XOXO